Mental Health Hotline

I saw this today and thought it was hilarious. If you've studied psychology, you will also find it exceptionally funny. If you haven't, it'll still probably be pretty funny. =)

Hello and welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transfer to the mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.
If you have a nervous disorder, fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line.
If you are dyslexic, press 696969696969.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

Hope you enjoyed that. =)

Unexpected guest

Ladies' class last night was a little more exciting than normal. And it had nothing to do with my teaching. lol. We had all just gotten into the classroom and were talking and catching up on each other's weeks. Something up on the ceiling caught my eye, and the girl next to me saw it too. We looked up and inside the fluorescent light was a little bitty mouse walking around. No idea how the little booger got in there, but he was. And he was probably getting a pretty good tan too. =) So needless to say, everyone was a little distracted for a few minutes. Then a few of us got some pretty good entertainment after church when a few men went back to try and get it out. They pulled the panel off, the mouse ran out the door, straight at the girl who was standing there watching. Of course she freaked out, especially when a man with a small garbage can came running at her after the mouse trying to catch it. lol. Unfortunately, his aim wasn't the best, so he crushed the poor little guy when he tried to put the garbage can over him. Granted, he did have to dive down the hallway after him... Micah later accused me of being a girl because I stood on a chair the whole time. Well, DUH! lol.

Speaking of ladies' class, next week's topic is jealousy.

Saturday I'm going to a ladies' day at the congregation where we used to attend. I'm not sure who the speaker is, but I'm excited about it. =)

Funny story before I go:: Most bloggers that I read tell a lot of stories about cute or funny things their kids say. Well...I don't have kids to tell funny stories about. But I DO have a husband who occasionally acts like a kid, so does that count? I hope so, b/c I have a funny saying from tonight. =) Now, this isn't the funniest thing he's ever said, but that's another blog for another day. (Ask me about mushroooms one day. hehehe)

Micah was loading the washing machine with a load of whites. He told me that he was going to put a few non-whites in there too, b/c he needed them, but didn't have time to do a dark load tonight too. I asked him what he was putting in there, and he replied that it was his basketball shorts, b/c they weren't made of cloth. =) I said, you mean cotton?? "Shut up!" was the response I got to that one. =)

Have a great night! And your quote to ponder for the night is :: Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true. :: =)